At 22 years old, newly married and in the deepest depression of my life, I had no idea how to find help. And even if I knew how, I had no motivation or energy or bravery to do it myself. I relied on a mentor to help locate a therapist for me. Her name was Nancy and she turned out to be the best therapist I’ve ever had.
Now I won’t say how many years ago that was, but let’s just say that the internet was less developed and there were no smartphones. Today, it is much easier to research therapists. Most of us have websites or profiles on directories such as PsychologyToday.com.
So let’s imagine that you are struggling with a relationship issue, an anxiety disorder, or a depressive episode. It is a brave thought to realize that you probably need to seek some help. But once you’ve decided to look for a therapist, where do you start?
Many of us go first to our doctors and pastors as the first lines of defense. Doctors will help us with medications and screen us for mental health diagnoses. Physicians vary in their ability to refer you to an appropriate therapist for you. They may look at your insurance plan and see who is contracted. Pastors may be at an even greater loss as to how to help you, unless they have put in the work of connecting with local therapists. They may meet with you for a few sessions to help determine if you need a level of care. (Hey pastors! If you know a therapist, now is a good time to ask them to make a list of referrals for you!)
So, How Do I Find a Therapist?
If your doctor or your pastor was not able to point you towards the right therapist, what’s your next step? Here are a few ways to go about it:
Word of Mouth
It’s true that many people do not like to talk about their mental health, emotions, or relationship problems. But you may be surprised how many people in your circle have actually seen a therapist at one time or another. Ask your trusted friends and acquaintances whom they recommend. You can say you’re “asking for a friend” if that makes you more comfortable.
Online Forums
If your church group, moms’ group, or other social gathering has a Facebook group, post in the group for recommendations for therapy. Recently a new client told me she found me by searching a Facebook group for therapist recommendations. Someone else had been asking, but she was able to find me without even revealing that she was looking for a therapist! I’ve even seen people asking for recommendations on the local exchange and chat groups on Facebook.
Your Insurance List
If you plan to use insurance to pay for your therapy, a good place to start is to request the list of therapists who are contracted with your plan. Once you have those names and addresses, you can do further research by searching for their websites to determine if you think they will be a good fit. (Always confirm that they are still taking your insurance.)
Online Directories
The most robust online directory for therapists is PsychologyToday.com. You can search for a therapist in your area and filter the results by gender, faith, specialty, age group, language, insurance, etc. Other directories such as goodtherapy.org and therapytribe.com offer a similar service, but tend not to show up quite as high in web searches, making their pool of therapists somewhat smaller.
Good Old Google
Most therapists have websites these days. If they are paying attention to their SEO (search engine optimization), they will pop up on your search when you enter your requirements. I believe you can tell a lot about someone from their website, and you will get a feel for whether they will fit for you. (Therapists: this is your signal that you need to update your website!)
What Happens Next?
Now that you have a list of ideas of how to find a therapist, prepare yourself for what might happen next. It’s a crying shame, but many therapists do not return phone calls. It’s a pet peeve of mine, but I have to say I’m guilty, too! We have the best intentions, but if our caseloads are full, we may not return your call. Therapists like me run a solo operation, handling scheduling, billing, client care, custodial services, marketing, etc, etc. Occasionally a potential client contact will fall through the cracks. If the therapist doesn’t have time to return your call, you probably don’t want to work with that person.
This can be incredibly frustrating for clients seeking a therapist. You may end up seeing the therapist who was the only person to return your call. Try sending an email, a message through the website, or a text message. You may get a quicker response because she will not have to set aside the additional time to return calls.
Once you make contact, you’ll schedule a screening call, to help determine if you are a good fit. Next week, I will be writing all about therapeutic “fit” and how to know if the therapist is the right one for you!
Listen to this fun interview where I talked about how to find a therapist on the Moms Struggling Well podcast. You can find it here: https://momstrugglingwell.com/podcast/159-ann-taylor-mcniece
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